Pure Defect

I came across this quite interesting study on those who have 'Friends with Benefits' as the common phrase goes. They surveyed 125 men and women at Michigan State University who said they had been in such an arrangement. I can honestly say I was expecting this to be a one-sided religiously backed study to prop up the idea of marriage as the only relationship that there should be which involves sex but so far I haven't seen proof of my suspicion. The breakdown for those who don't want to read the article is rather simple, and I have taken out the percentages to show you real numbers instead.

• 12.5 said the FWB turned into conventional romantic relationships
• 41.666666667 stopped having sex but remained friends
• 31.25 completely broke contact with the other person
• 39.583333333 remained in the same arrangement

It was conjectured that people got involved with a friend with benefits because of a desire to avoid all emotional baggage that comes with a normal romantic relationship, yet 12 people interviewed fell into just that. Its not surprising that the largest group was those who broke off a FWB arrangement; People are not always compatible but with little to no attachment (outside of the sex) I'm sure the splits in those cases were far easier than those occurring in relationships that have been going for years or even several months.

Some of the conclusions derived in the study, particularly by Paul Mongeau strike me as perhaps a bit slanted. He states “One of the most interesting things I get from it, is this sense that people in these relationships are afraid to develop feelings for the other person, because those feelings might be unreciprocated.” This seems to come from someone who more than likely is married or at least in a long-term relationship that is mostly fulfilling; there are a myriad of other reasons people might choose such a relationship over a romantic counterpart such as having far too involved a life to justify pulling double duty with a significant other. Hell someone might just be that self centered that they don't care enough to invest their emotions in a romantic relationship so they align themselves with someone with a similar mindset and desire to indulge in physical pleasure.

Labels: friends-with-benefits, relationships, spin