He too, admitted a few things. He said he is at heart traditional—his favorite position is missionary. He said he feels completely fulfilled. He said to him, when we have sex he sees me and us and our relationship as part of the act and because of that it is a deep emotional experience for him
He is not at heart traditional, few people really are. Most have at least one off-kilter fetish that they would like to indulge in but for one reason or another do not. Some like pain games, others like water games, and then there are your relatively normal folks who just want to see their partner dressed up in some costume before they get down to it. The point is that nobody is this plain vanilla that all they want is normal heterosexual intercourse in one single position with no accessories or props.
Completely fulfilled would entail getting exactly what he wants, and if he is continuing till she climaxes then hes not. By nature men are designed to spread their seed, and thus we aren't supposed to spend hours on sex but rather get it done as quickly and efficiently as possible. Once done generally we like to either have a smoke, drink something and then fall asleep unless we have pressing obligations outside the bedroom. Straight men are NOT into deep emotional experiences where sex is concerned, we want to get ours and then pass the hell out. Men who claim these things tend not to be men at all but sexually confused women who has the misfortune of being given the wrong chromosome during their stay in the hotel uterus.
The comments section following up the blog has some real great gems as well, such as this one:
Porn is adictive, which is why many men who don't fit the category above nevertheless can't quit. If you don't think you're addicted try doing without it for a month or two.
Wrong again buck-o! Porn is porn, it exists to fill a need which obviously the viewer's partner cannot or will not. Its no more addictive than a ham sandwich (which while good does get old after a while). I contend that porn is the intelligent man's choice of stimulus; once you have seen the games and gimmicks that women pull you find porn to be a perfect alternative to a nagging, complaining, insecure and vindictive woman. Porn wont bitch at you for leaving the toilet seat up, for coming home late from poker night, etc.
Please be careful my dear. online and the persona he has online may be a sign of a Sexaholic. If your relationship is healthy, then the try some porn to enhance, teach, and more.But if he gets up at odd times and uses the computer for private surfing then take caution. I have said enough for now.
ZOMG! he uses the computer at weird hours! I hope this commenter never decides to date a geek or IT professional. Some times your laying there in bed thinking about a programing problem that has been haunting you all day and suddenly the fix just pops into your head, the only logical choice is to jump the hell up and go write it out at least in notepad if not in the compiler as soon as possible before you forget it. Or maybe he is checking his auctions on Ebay or even World of Warcraft. Maybe hes actually being thoughtful for once and checking on a gift that he ordered for you, but now you want to accuse him of being some bullshit sexoholic!
It's just unsettling that he looks at other women when I'm less than 30 feet away, sleeping, but I guess that's beyond my point.
Do you want him to wake you up for sex at whatever hour it is, which you will promptly shoot down because you are 'le tired' or otherwise annoyed that his primary function in life is calling at such an hour? Take you pick; he can either wake you up to satisfy his needs, browse over to his favorite TGP or video clip site and rub one out, or take a trip across town at 2 in the morning to bang an ex because you gave him a rash of shit about surfing porn or waking you up for some midnight action.
Porn can destroy your relationship. My husbands porn went from movies and mags to strip clubs and internet searches for VERY disturbing things. I've been married 20 years, got married at age 18. I started out watching them with him, thinking I was being a prude but it didn't help. All that did was encourage and enable him. At one point, he was asking me to participate in making some of his fantasies real. Which I did not!
From reading this one I get the impression that she was just disgusted by the idea of oral sex, or maybe trying anal, perhaps a little smacking of the butt or whatever else her man was into. The fact that she didn't illustrate even in vague terms what his fetish was hints that it probably wasn't that bad but she was just too rigid to budge on her stance of being a frigid prude. Heavens forbid he actually wants you to take part in the fantasy; forget the fact that hes actually sharing it with you thus showing a level of trust and that he wants YOU to be a part of it and not the cashier of the local convenience store. Yet again women prove my point that porn by itself is far superior to them because porn doesn't guilt trip you, drag you through the mud and try to make you feel lower than whale shit.
I must add that I was pleased to see other men chime in to this blog entry with comments basically telling the author how full of shit she was, because thats how it is. Its just a shame more men wont stand up and call it like they see it.